Looking up from my computer, I watched my cat bring a slithering guest into the living room. Coiled in a defensive stance, it remained motionless. I imagined it was planning its escape. Having lived in the desert for so long, a snake sighting, even indoors, is no cause for alarm. This was not a dangerous or venomous creature, just one that had been attacked by my cat and needed a little support getting back outside.
With an old t-shirt wrapped around my hand, I scooped it up and carried it out to the rosemary bush in my yard. While still holding the snake, I turned on the spigot to offer it water before it journeyed back into the arid world. Its head perked up from the coil, and as it began to lift its brown body, I released it. Without a moment of hesitation, it slithered away, declining my offer of water.
At first, this might seem like a simple interaction with a wild animal, but in that moment, a deeper metaphor and perspective began to reveal themselves. Challenges I've faced in discerning when to give and when to preserve my own energy were mirrored in my brief encounter with this snake. Over the last few months, I’ve been working on accepting some hard lessons in heartbreak and disappointment. I usually have good boundaries around monetary and material resources, but when it comes to time, energy, and care, I seem to think that I am akin to the ace of cups—overflowing with love to share freely, without the need for reciprocity.
I’ve been healing feelings of resentment and regret for moments I’ve overextended myself. Instead of considering my time wasted, I am learning to take responsibility and practice better discernment. Some people lollygag through life, not recognizing the boundaries or effort involved. Ultimately, it is my responsibility to protect my own wellbeing so that my generosity can remain meaningful and not inadvertently deplete me.
The snake, a visitor in my life, didn’t ask for my help, but I felt compelled to offer it. I felt no resentment when I had to take it outdoors because it couldn’t get there on its own, and I was not offended when it declined the water I offered. The snake didn’t waste my time or take advantage of my generosity, and I expected nothing in return.
This experience reaffirmed a philosophy I’ve been developing about unconditional love and generosity. In the same way that I chose to help the snake without expectation, I’m learning to approach my relationships with discernment, ensuring that my generosity is both thoughtful and sustainable.
On a broader level, this encounter reminded me that in all aspects of life, offering love and care without expectations is the most fulfilling way of interacting with others. Whether in personal relationships or in our wider communities, the balance between giving and preserving our own energy is key to having healthy connections. In the end, generosity is about giving wisely, with a heart full of discernment, and without regret.
